An Interview with Mel Cooper
- Q. How old are you, Mel?
A. In dog years I'm 406. Do the math.
- Q. How many times have you been married?
A. To a woman? Only once. Followed by a very amicable,
uncontested divorce. All I wanted was my house. Cost me a bundle.
- Q. How long have you been cooking for yourself?
A. Less than two years. By the way, what's for dinner?
- Q. Since you've been dating how many notches do you have on your gun?
A. I am not a "serial dater" if that's what you're getting at.
No doubt some men deserve that label, but I don't. I intend to re-marry.
Absolutely! I believe I would make the right girl a fine husband. The love
of my life is waiting for me to find her. I'll know her when I
find her and she'll know me. This is not a game of scoring "notches"
where I'm concerned.
- Q. How far will you go ... er, travel ... to see a woman?
A. If you can get there from ATL and the plane ticket isn't much more than
I normally spend on dinner for an actual date with a woman in Atlanta ($$),
then I'm there! I LOVE Florida. A lot. No state personal income tax. But
I don't discriminate if the woman doesn't live in the Sunshine State.
After all, It's not the place, but the person.
By the way ... I would welcome and opportunity to move to be with the right woman if that's important to her (assuming she lives in the warm South!).
- Q. Do you darken the door of a church on Sundays?
A. Yes. Every Sunday. I am a Christian. A Believer.
Frankly, I don't get these women online who say they're "spiritual by not religious."
I can only say they're missing out on a life of true contentment and
peace. Besides, I don't believe in reinventing a wheel that
was made 2000 years ago.
- Q. So, Mel, how do you pay the bills?
A. I haven't paid them yet.
- Q. No, really ... what do you do for a living.
A. I've owned my own business for over 22 years. I'm a
search engine marketing consultant. I help businesses use my company's software tools to track and improve online buying behaviors.
I actually had no choice in the matter of
working for myself. I kept getting fired from regular jobs.
Their loss for sure! Plus, I can work anywhere as long as I have
my laptop and a good Internet connection. Cool, huh?
- Q. Boxers or briefs?
A. Briefs ... but not in bed.
- Q. Do you consider yourself a confident,
A. Yes, but I'm not absolutely sure.
- Q. Do love your mother?
A. What? Are you kidding? Of course I love my mother.
And I'll do anything to stay in her Will!
- Q. What is your favorite color?
A. Well, I have a list of favorite colors ... in precise order.
Black, red, yellow, silver, and white.
- Q. Let's get back to you and women.
Do you enjoy engaging in a little PDA?
A. Yes! I'm old enough not to care what anyone thinks when I kiss a woman
in public ... as long as she doesn't care. And if she does, then I'm
probably not going to be the man for her. I don't mean being lewd or
embarrassing in public, but a quick kiss on the lips is so sexy to me ...
and I hope to her as well.
- Q. Do you bar hop?
A. No. For that to really pan out you have to stay up way past
my normal bed time. And then only the young chicks show up at the
bars. I'm not interested in 20-something girls in the least because I
would have absolutely nothing in common with them.
- Q. As a man of a certain age you're
saying you are NOT interested in younger women?
A. No, no, no! There are so many really gorgeous, hot women in
their late 40's and 50's that it's silly to waste time with young girls still in their 20's. Immaturity is a turn-off for me.
- Q. What is your favorite food?
A. Italian, Italian, and Italian. Any kind of pasta is fine with
me. Basic spaghetti with thick tomato sauce, Italian sausage, and beef
meatballs sprinkle with Parmesan cheese is heaven!
- Q. What was the last concert you
attended with a date?
A. Maroon 5 during their latest tour in Birmingham, AL as of 2013.
The light show and video effects were astounding!
- Q. What was the last book you read?
A. I read non-fiction books -- mostly books related to my profession.
My father told me when I was a young man that "you will never waste your
money by buying a good book." He was right.
Also, I've recently read "All In -- The Education [and Downfall?] of General David Petraeus".
Superb book despite his subsequent sex scandal with the Paula Broadwell, the
- Q. What is your favorite mode of
A. Well, I have a 2013 Honda Accord Sport. I don't drive much in my work, so I just need something that get's me from A to B.
I'm not into cars much. But my
absolute favorite mode of transportation is on two wheels: My Yamaha
FJR 1300 Super Sport Touring motorcycle. It's like an addiction to
crack. I love it and prefer it to a "cage" (automobile) by a long shot.
- Q. Are you in good physical health?
A. Yes! In fact, men in the Cooper family live too way long for their own
good. But seriously, I seem to be in perfect physical health. I do
not smoke and will not date someone who does. I drink very seldom.
Q. So, in the fewest words possible how
would you describe your ideal partner in life?
- She is a Christian;
- No health-threatening, communicable diseases;
- Not a non-prescription drug-taker;
- She takes very good care of herself physically and intends on staying that way.
Slim or "athletic & toned" preferred;
- Educated (preferably at least a BA or equivalent experience). Note: Any degree from Auburn University would rocket her to the very top of the list! (BIG laugh!);
- Naturally attractive (but not necessarily a runway model);
- Not embarrassed about telling me what she wants;
- She has no children still living at home;
- Not "currently separated" (I don't date married women);
- She has no prison record -- But that is not a deal-breaker;
- She isn't a high-maintenance woman. (You know who your are!)
- For the love of all that's good and decent in the world she must NOT, N-O-T (!!) be emotionally traumatized by a bad experience with other men in her past!
(Jeez! Enough is enough! I am NOT a therapist.)
- She is the type of girl who always makes a point of saying "Thank you!" when a guy spends money on her during a date -- whether she likes him or not!
I believe this says a LOT about her character and definitely
influences my opinion about a woman.
- But most of all, I'm looking for a woman who wants to love and be loved by
her man every day ... for the rest of her life.